10 Ways to Shower if You Live in a Van

"Cold Shower" by sethdickens (CC BY-SA 2.0)

Lotta wannabe vandwellers worry 'bout how they're gonna wash the stink off. No problem. Easy really. Showers ain't hard to come by down by the river. Here's some options off the top of my head.

10 Vanlife Shower Options

1. Gyms / Fitness Centers

This is a popular option for your urban vandwellers and OTR types frequenting cities. Get you a cheap membership to one of the national gym chains. Then shower as needed. Get a workout, too!

Vanholio don't hang around cities much, so this option's kinda useless for me. But don't let that stop you!

2. Truck Stops

Your big truck stops – T&A, Pilot, Flying J, etc. – usually have showers for the truckers. They're pricey at about $10-12 per shower. Most a the chains got deals for free showers if ya buy a lotta gas from them, so look into it.

Pilot's the only chain Vanholio's used, and only twice. But I can report that the showers were clean, fancy even, and Pilot provided soap and towels. At one place, a trucker gave me one a his free showers. I don't know whether he just thought Pilot are fucking shysters at $12 a pop or if I looked desperate. Free is free, so I just said, Thank you!

Makes me wonder if you couldn't buy showers at a discount from the truckers direct, say offer $5 for the credit. Most of them got more free showers than they can use anyway. Buddy a mine used ta be homeless, and said he'd hang around'n trucker's'd give him tokens for nothin'!

3. Campgrounds and RV Parks

Ya don't need to pay for a site. While it ain't exactly kosher, hardly no one'll notice if ya use a state, city, or county park campground's shower. This is a great deal if ya got an annual pass to cover the daily entrance. Plus some a your National Forest and BLM campgrounds got showers, though this ain't typical.

Small, private RV parks will often let travelers buy just a shower. The going rate seems to be $5. The laundry facilities is usually more-reasonably priced than a laundromat, too.

Some campgrounds and RV parks got coin-operated showers, which usually run a $1.00 to $1.50 for 4-6 minutes.

4. Swimming

Many a time Vanholio's taken a dip in a lake, river, or creek to clean off. I carry a bathing suit for the purpose, but I suppose ya could go like Adam and Eve. Don't pollute with soap, though. I just use sand and clay ta scrub off.

Sometimes public beaches got free rinse showers. Use them after your dip, or alone if it's too cold to swim.

5. Public Bathrooms

You can always get yourself a sponge / washcloth bath in a public bathroom anywhere. For privacy and stealth, a one-user bathroom is probably best. Don't be an asshole: Wipe up any mess you make.

6. Deodorizing Rinses

Vanholio uses this No-Rinse Body Wash he read about on some vandwelling forum. Works good. It's a deodorizing, moisturizing lotion ya just spread on and let dry. I think they come up with it for invalids. It's really good when it's cold out 'cause I can just apply in the van. Seen another brand sold at Walgreens.

I heard some vanlifers do a similar thing homemade. One gal uses a spray bottle filled with vinegar solution. And there are always cleansing wipes.

7. Friends and Family

Visitin' folks for dinner? Ask if they don't mind if you grab a quick shower. Most a your better people will oblige. But don't keep hittin' up the same folks too often. You'll wear out your welcome.

8. Portable Showers

Lots a vandwellers have worked out one kind of shower or other. There're commercial products, like camp showers, and even fancier gadgets. One of the most clever ideas I ever heard was using one of those pressure canisters ,usually used for fertilizer, pesticides, and bug spray. You could even poke holes in the bottom of a plastic bucket, fill it up, and hang it from a tree branch.

9. Garden Hose

If ya find a hose or can add a hose and spray nozzle to an outdoor tap somewhere, you got it made. Put on your swimsuit, hose down, soap up, hose down again, and towel down. You're done. For your nethers, just shoot water down into your swimsuit.

10. Car Wash

I never tried this nor ever even heard it being done... But why not go to a self-serve car wash!? I'm talking about the kind where you drive into a bay and use a powerwash gun. Maybe the gun's too long or two high-pressure? Still think it could work in a pinch. Vanholio'd just use the water rinse – no car soap. I'd also probably go at night or sometime there wouldn't be many around.

Between Showers

Also, consider that with daily deodorant; washing your face, pits, and nethers; and changing your clothes regular, you won't need to bathe all that often. Good hygeine is good for you, helps relations, and hides you in plain site from the LEOs.

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Clean Ass Top Priority for Vandwellers
• Bathing in Creeks, Rivers, and Lakes – #Vanlife Bonus!
• Here's How to Install a Shower in Your Van (Do It Yourself RV)
• How Often Do You Really Need to Shower, According to Science (Buzzfeed)

Read More »

Top 10 Questions About Living in a Van

People keep asking Vanholio and other fulltime vandwellers the same goddamn questions about vanlife over and over again. Here’s short answers ta the Top 10.

Now understand that these are just Vanholio’s answers. I gots my biases. Plus Vanholio is an OTR (on the road) vandweller. I’d do things different if I lived in a city.

Top 10 Vanlife Questions Answered

1. What kind of van should I get?

Vanholio’s got a Promaster City converted ta camper. That’s a bit small for most. Full-size vans is most common. But hell, I seen folks live in everything from Priuses up to buses, plus every kind a trailer or tent. What you need is ta keep the weather off ya. After that, it’s what you like and can afford. If you can work with what ya already own, that's what I'd do.

2. How do you heat and cool the van?

Vanholio’s goal is keeping hisself – his body – at a nice temp. Heat and A/C for a van is one way ta do that. Plenty a folks have ways. My ultimate climate controls is longitude and altitude. But I also use clothes, blankets, and acclimatization to keep warm; and good fans, ventilation, and moisture evaporation ta keep cool.

3. How do you shower?

First off, ya don’t need a shower every goddamn day, unless you’re gettin' truly dirty at work. But showers ain’t hard. If you ain’t got access at a gym or built inta your rig, ya can get showers at truck stops and campsites, use portable shower gadgets, or clean up with wipes or no-rinse body wash. Shit, at worse all ya need is a bucket, water, soap'n a washcloth!

4. Where do you go to the bathroom?

In the last year, I only had to shit in the woods about half dozen times. Mostly, I used regular public or business bathrooms, or else vault toilets in the forests. ‘Course as a male, pissing wherever the fuck I want ain’t an issue.

5. What do you do for money?

Besides a bit from bloggin', Vanholio does online surveys and has investment income. Lots a travelin' vandwellers got businesses or jobs they can do via internet, phone, or mail, or by settin' up shop here'n there. Others find temp jobs around the country. Really ain’t that tough 'cause vanlife is cheap (or can be).

6. How much does living in a van cost?

This is gonna depend on your tastes, but from all I’ve heard the average vandweller lives on $1,000 or less per month. Some far less than that.

7. Do you have a gun?

No. I ain’t opposed to folks 2nd Amendment rights, but personally don’t feel trained enough to use a gun right under stress. I do carry weapon-ready tools. But, but, BUT, my first defense is usin' my brain ta avoid trouble and avoid being noticed. Plus I got a Watch Chihuahua!

8. Do the cops hassle you?

Living in a van ain’t exactly illegal. But local statutes and nosy cops can make it hard. I avoid them places, and I'm damn sneaky when I can’t. Plus I move around, keep well groomed, and have a clean vehicle, so I don’t catch the LEO’s eyes.

9. Where do you park at night?

Since Vanholio is a traveler and prefers the wild, I usually camp in the backcountry of national forests and BLM land. But I’ve also slept in Walmarts and other parking lots, rest stops, campgrounds, RV parks, friends’ driveways, curbside, and behind abandoned buildings.

10. Isn't living in a van lonely?

Oh, hell no! First off, loneliness is a state of mind. Second, if you want society, it’s easy to find as much as you want, with a little thought. Even pussy or cock, or whatever revs your engine!

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See …

• Vanlife How-To
• Is Living in Your Van Illegal?
• How Much Does Living in a Van Cost?
• Top 5 #Vanlife FAQs Answered by the Experts! (Escape Campervans)

Read More »

How to Shit in a Hole in the Ground

"Dig a cathole," they say, "When you're boondocking and there ain't no toilets around." But how? How you use that without gettin' shit 'n pee all over yourself!? Read on! Uncle Vanholio'll learn ya!

13 Steps to Shittin' Pretty

1. Find a Private Spot. This is damn important, trust me!


2. Dig a hole about 6-8" inches deep (15-20 cm). Vanholio prefers ta use a small mattock over a trowel 'cause it'll tear through rocky or rooty soil better.


3. Take off your britches, underwear'n all. Maybe you got a way ta pull 'em outta the way, but Vanholio just finds this step prevents "mistakes." If you're wearin' a dress or kilt, I guess ya could hike it up.


4. Line up your heels even with the front a the hole. (See where the sandals is in that photo above.) That'll let aim up your turds ta drop square inta the hole.


5. Squat and shit. Ya don't even need ta squat all that much. Vanholio squats maybe as much as sittin' on a tall chair. Also helps ta pull your buttcheeks apart.


6. Keep squatting and wipe. Have that TP handy so ya don't have to stand up. If ya stand, ya might squish the leftover crap onta your buttcheeks more.


7. Dispose a the toilet paper: Option 1: Drop it inta the hole like you'd expect. Option 2: Put the used TP inta a ziplock bag ta carry to a trash can. That's what Vanholio does in arid places.


8. Piss inta the hole, if ya gotta. Most nutrients that leave the body come out in pee. I figure that and the moisture'll help the crap break down quicker.


9. Clean your ass. Having a clean ass is your No. 1 vanlife priority. There or back at camp, use some "flushable" wipes to make sure there ain't nothin' left in the crack. Get your whole nethers clean.


10. Put on your britches. Or go commando. Your call.


11. Fill in the hole. Maybe stomp on it after to squash that dirt down.


12. Wash your hands. If ya ain't got soap and water ta spare, do like Vanholio does. Clean your hands with another wipe, then use some antiseptic gel.


13. Enjoy the relief. Walk away. Sigh deep. Hell, smoke 'em if ya got 'em.

Honestly, ya get used to it. It ain't that bad. After years on the road, Vanholio don't see no need ta carry a tiny toilet with him. No siree!

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Gettin' mail on the road? Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Shit in Woods Goes Gross to Nightmare
• Clean Ass No. 1 Top Priority for Vandwellers
• Principle 3: Dispose of Waste Properly (Leave No Trace) 
• Fossilized Feces Tell Tale of Earliest Americans (NPR)

Read More »

What if I Die Alone in the Van?

Common fear if ya do vanlife solo (or even as a couple) is what'll happen if ya die or get too sick ta help yourself. Valid worry. Shit happens! An' the older ya get, the more likely it becomes.

Here's how ta cover yourself in case ol' vanlife goes ta hell. (Most a this info is Android based, but iOS should have similar. Even some dumbphones do.)

1. Stay in Contact Daily

Vanholio uses the vanlife buddy system. Every night, he uses an app ta text his GPS location to his best buddy and medical POA.

Sendin' out my GPS coordinates via SMS has three advantages:

1. It's the most current location ta find me.
2. It works when cellular Internet don't work. All I need is the barest cell signal.
3. It lets my buddy know that I'm conscious and OK at that moment.

If I know I'm goin' totally off-grid, I'll text my current location and a summary of my travel plans. Includin' when he can expect ta hear from me next!

2. Use Your Smartphone as a Tracker

What if you're unconscious or otherwise can't contact out? What if ya moved since your last text in? That's where some kinda phone-based trackin' system works.

Right now, Vanholio's sharin' his location ta some friends usin' Google Maps. It's automatic once set up, which is great.

The downside is it only saves the last location I was on the internet. In other words, it don't work for shit if when your totally offgrid. But at least it gives searchers a startin' point.

Even better would be some kinda app that lets your buddies or family get your GPS coordinates via an SMS message, independent of Internet access.. That'll work as long as your phone is on and has the barest cell signal. There's a few apps out there.

3. Have Affairs in Order

It's damn smart ta have an Advance Directive, Last Will and Testament, and all that other shit ready ta go. 

Truly, Vanholio don't care much about whatever pathetic assets left when he bites it. Ain't my fuckin' problem. But I sure as hell care about my dog! And myself if I'm hard up but not quite dead.

The Advance Directive, gives instructions ta the doctors on how much I want done and what I think is bullshit. No fuckin' way I wanna be kept as a vegetable!

My best buddy is my Medical Power of Attorney (POA). He knows how I feel about things and'll see it done ta the best of his ability. I also got a regular POA ta handle the bills while I'm down.

Finally, I got a Pet Care Agreement and some money set aside 'specially for my dog. It's an agreement a who gets Ms. Barkley if I go. Has some backup folks, too. I'd hate ta think she'd die heartbroken and alone in a shelter. That shouldn't happen.

Now, ya might think plannin' all that stuff is gruesome. But it gives Vanholio peace a mind. Truly.

4. Keep Easy-to-Find ICE Info

Say LEOs or other first responders find you out or dead? Make sure they know what ta do. Vanholio's got printed and digital instructions for ICE (In Case of Emergency).

On my phone, I got an ICE app that does three things:

1. It has my emergency contacts, includin' doctors, family, and POAs.
2. It has my medical info, such as meds, allergies, and conditions.
3. It has an emergency button I can press ta automessage my best buddy/medical POA, plus his wife.

But wait, there's more! Vanholio printed two laminated cards, one for his wallet and one mounted on the driver's shade in the van. It's got my meds, insurance info, allergies, where ta locate the Advance Directive, etc. in the van and online, and my emergency contacts.

Friend a mine is a hospital nurse. Says they get in single people all the time, especially middle aged men, with no info about who they are, what medical conditions they have, who ta contact, or nothin'. Makes their jobs damn hard. And maybe they don't guess right what the unconscious patient wants. Don't be that guy.

5. Get a Satellite Locator

Actually, I ain't got this yet. They're kinda pricey. But if you're type a vanlife takes ya outta cell range, look at a personal locator beacon or satellite messenger. Both work off satellite, so ya just need sky where you're at.

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Van Life Travel Safety 101
• Is Living in a Van Lonely?
• One Day, You're Going to Die. Here's How to Prepare for It (LifeHacker)
• The Ultimate Threat to Single People: You'll Die Alone (Psychology Today)

Read More »

5 Unusual Stealth Camping Spots OTR

Here's some crazy stealth boondock spots Vanholio's used travelin' on the road. He's always keepin' an eye out for 'em, especially when Walmart ain't nearby.

Some are legal. Most is legal or iffy. Unless overnight campin' is specifically allowed, I advise ya get in near dark and leave early, and stay alert. If it's a touristy area, maybe don't push it too much. Cops will check on their rounds.

1. Fishin' Access

Tiny Colorado reservoir (more a pond) with fishin' access

Where there's water, people camp. That's a fact. If ya pass a body a water, however tiny, look for a spot. If ya see blue on the Google Map, swing by and check it out.

Lotsa states got legal fishin' access areas, even on small creeks and reservoir ponds. Rocky mountain states make a point of it. Those states also usually allow overnight campin' (if it's not a touristy area). They often got a vault toilet, too.

In places where it ain't exactly legal, it's usually tolerated. The local teenagers and hobos know where these spots is. Look for a dirt vehicle trail headin' inta brush. Dollars ta donuts that down by the water, you'll find a old campfire with broken glass and beer cans all around.

2. Bridges

Dirt road goes down under bridge and along the river

Bridges all kinds usually got someplace ya can camp overnight. And they space under and around a bridge is often a kinda no man's land. That and shelter's why hobos love 'em.

The problem with boondockin' by a bridge is traffic. Remote bridges where there ain't much night traffic is best.

In that photo above, the road down by the bridge is for fishin' access. But you'll find a way down under bridges that cross washes, canyons, gulches, train tracks, and roads, too.

3. Road Maintenance Cache Pulloffs

Found this almost-hidden pulloff in New Mexico's Black Range

Not sure what ta call these exactly. What I'm talkin' 'bout are little roadside pulloffs where state and county road crews keep piles a sand and salt. Also sometimes they park equipment there.

The pulloffs are all over. In the mountains, they usually got 'em just before the steep and snowline. As it's public land, it should be legal. Not sure. Only signs I ever seen were warnins not ta steal from the maintenance piles, if they got 'em.

4. Utility Substations

Parked right afront this substation one night, just like I belonged

Substations for electric, water, and telecom is all over the country. Often they're surrounded by chain link and on private land. But maybe 1 outta 3 times, ya can get in there without crossin' Farmer Brown's land.

Park behind them. Or if your rig looks like a work truck, just park it right out in the open. It'll look like utility workers just left it there overnight.

5. Vacant Buildings

No one'll see ya in that loading bay

Old buildings or buildings under construction are great places to boondock. Who the hell is gonna be there overnight!? Especially as zonin' separates most from residential areas.

Commercial buildings often have a loading bay, and it's usually in the back or otherwise hidden from the road. Perfect!

If there's construction vehicles and your rig looks like a work van or truck, just park by the construction equipment. Who's to say ya don't belong?

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• 5 Reasons NOT to Camp by Water
• Map of Walmarts Where Camping Is Allowed or NOT Allowed
• Unusual Places to Stealth Camp… (Open Roads Forum)
• Unique Overnight Stops at Wineries, Farms and Attractions (Harvest Hosts)

Read More »

Are You Homeless if You Live in a Van?

Per Uncle Sam, if you don’t live in a code-approved building, you’re "homeless." That shit ain't realistic for van life nomads. It’s about being broke and short on options. Here’s a tale of two vandwellers, Vanholio and Vanholio Sr., to show you why.

A Tale of Two Vandwellers

Vanholio Sr. (Pops) Was Homeless

Pops had problems. He could never hold down a job for one thing. I think he had major depression, along with some notions on life that didn’t help him none. Never could get a straight answer from family, and Pops died in my teens. Whatever his problems were, his life was a goddamn mess.

I remember a year or two that Pops lived in his old VW Bus. It was parked in the fenced lot behind his friend’s car repair shop. You know, where they keep the cars they’re gonna fix.

I’d visit him and stay in the old vanagon. Even in winter with four foot of snow. Even in sweltering, sticky summers.

He’d avoid driving the VW because he couldn’t afford gas and maintenance. Probably wasn’t insured, I bet. We’d walk or take public transport everywhere.

To get a shower, we’d walk to an old YMCA after dark, climb up the fire escape, and a buddy would let us in a window.

At the time, I didn’t think nothing of it. Didn’t realize Pops was homeless until I was an adult. He was out of money and short on options. He lived in a van as his best worst choice.

When Pops was almost dead, I asked him, “What do you dream about?” I guess I’d seen too many dumb movies and thought the dying had some spiritual wisdom. But what he said was, “All the shitty places I’ve lived.”

Vanholio Ain’t Nothing Like Homeless

Unlike Pops, I got options – shitloads of options. In America, that means cash. Hell, I’m better off than the average American, who can’t handle a $500 surprise bill!

Vanholio owns his comfy van outright and ain't got no debts. He’s got plenty of savings for a rainy day. He’s got an adequate income. He’s even got medical insurance!

Most important, thanks to cheap, effective antidepressants, therapy, and some good life lessons, Vanholio ain’t got Pops' problems. (Yes, I inherited the famil depression. Written the morbid poetry to prove it!)

Vanholio is living the good life: plenty of money, plenty of friends, a cheerful outlook, and decent health. Plus I wake up in beautiful places. Today that’s a Utah mountain forest!

I could live in gov’ment sanctioned bricks and sticks. But I don’t wanna. Vanholio has made the happy choice to live in a van, a choice uncoerced by shitty circumstances. And that’s why he ain’t homeless, whatever fucked up definition for “homeless” Uncle Sam uses.

A Better Understanding of 'Homeless'

Read a 2014 interview with Andrew Waits, photographer of “Boondock,” a collection of vehicle dweller photos. He looked at both those who didn’t embrace van life and those who did, those who consider themselves homeless and those who consider themselves lucky.

I observed that many times the deciding factor in whether an individual identifies as homeless has to do with whether or not that person has a safety net in place. This could mean money in the form of savings, a pension, health insurance, or disability. However, the impact is much greater when that safety net also includes family, friends, or a community of support.

So there you have it. In their own eyes, homeless people are those who can’t live in a place they consider safe and decent because they lack a safety net. A defining part of being “homeless” is being so broke and isolated that you’re short on good options for the necessities of life. Living in a van down by the river is almost despite the point.

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Gettin' mail on the road? Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Traveling Mailbox Saves Vandweller $$$$
• Top 10 Questions About Living in a Van (YouTube)
• Former Homeless People Explain What Really Helps (Warped Speed)

Read More »

What Are BLM and Forest Service Roads Like to Drive?

If ya wanna get inta vanlife boondockin', ya likely been curious 'bout what it's like to drive unpaved backroads. That and what gear ya need. Let me tell ya!

Now, Vanholio ain't no offroad drivin' expert. But he's gone down plenty a forest service roads and other unpaved roads in near three years a vanlife. So he's got a view to the situation. Plus he's made plenty a mistakes and paid in hassle and repairs. So listen up!

Vanholio's Advice on Drivin' Forest Service Roads

Look what Vanholio! did to hisself!

This below conversation (edited somewhat) is from when Vanholio got hisself stuck last fall. A fellow handled "Antigroundhogday," who's workin' toward vanlife, wanted intel on the forest service roads. Been meanin' to post it for all ya'll's education for a while.

Antigroundhogday: What recovery gear do you roll with?

Vanholio: Not enough! Digging supplies [e.g., shovel], good jack, Slime, 12v air pump, spare tire, tow strap, tools. Really need some traction pads.

[I'd add to this list several days of food and water, blankets or sleeping bag, lighter, flashlight, first aid kit, cell phone (or satellite communicator if you're waaaay back), tree strap, and Come-a-Long winch or HiLift Jack.]

Antigroundhogday: As a guy who is sitting at a desk watching you live the life, I wish I knew what the terrain looked like, that requires rescue tools that you mentioned. There are these picture as places I see vandwellers go to, but I have a hard time associating them with tools required.

Vanholio: 95% a the time, forest service roads are pretty smooth, like these two below.

2 Average FSR in Good Repair

Sometimes they're a bit more wore down, like these two. Then ya just gotta watch for the occasional rock stickin' up a bit.

2 FSR Slightly Eroded But Passable

Where I get in trouble is when I hit mud, sand, a creek crossing, or serious erosion (like these last photos) and think to myself, "Oh, I can pick my way ..." 'cause I don't want to turn back.

2 FSR Highly Eroded, Mainly Jeep Trails

Understand, I don't really got a offroad vehicle. I'm using something designed for street and pushing my luck.

[Vanholio's got a Ram Promaster City. Since this conversation, he's gotten a lift and all-terrain tires.]

Antigroundhogday: Many thanks for the photos. So these tougher roads... are they the road to these incredible places with views for miles or just you being a guy and saying "why not, let's see what's down here?"

Vanholio: Yeah, the latter mainly. Ya really don't need 4WD to get most places, including WOW places. In fact, WOW places often get the paved roads. The only thing I would really advise for any of the gravel or dirt roads is good tires. Don't go cheap on those. More clearance and 4WD or AWD gives you more slack and options [especially with snow, sand, and mud]. But it is far, far from a must.

Dig Deeper

Antigroundhogday posted ta the Cheap RV Living forum, seekin' more advice. Read the thread. It rounds out what Vanholio said and fills in the cracks. Ya might learn somethin'! I did!

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Finding FREE Public Lands for Boondocking
• Need 4WD for Van Life Backwoods Boondocking?
• An Introduction to Off-Roading (The Art of Manliness)
• Forest Service Road System (USFS)
• What Will It Take to Navigate These Roads Safely? (Cheap RV Living forum thread)

Read More »

Best Van for Vanlife Conversion? 2 Articles and Some Considerations

That's the question everyone thinkin' about vanlife asks. The answer is there is no perfect vanlife van. Far as Vanholio's concerned, "vanlife" means livin' minimalist on the road. To do that, even a bicycle could work.

That said, ya probably wanna build a *van* van – if ya can't buy a conversion campervan outright, that is. Most folks do.

That's where this article on Curbed is a real help: "The 5 best vans for your DIY camper conversion." I think it's a fair overview of the fullsize vans out there.

But Why Go So Big? Small Vans Rock!

Vanholio's in a Promaster City, a tiny van that serves him just fine. Similar are the Ford Transit Connect,  Nissan NV200, and Mercedes-Benz Metris.

The smaller vans got two major advantages, to my mind. First, they got better mileage. Second, if you're not a fulltimer, they do better double duty as daily drivers. You can find lotsa conversion examples online for the smaller vans.

6 Questions to Ask of Every Van

But whatever kinda a vehicle you're considerin', take a look at my "6 Questions to Ask when Choosing Your Van Life Rig. I bring it back ta First Principles. That's where ya wanna start, not in a showroom.

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Don't Buy a Van Before You Hit the Road
• Do I Need a 4WD to Boondock?
• Van Interiors (VanGrrrl on Pinterest)
• Vanlifeideas (Instagram Channel)

Read More »

Is Living in Your Van Illegal?

Hell no,  livin' in your car, van, RV, tent, clay pot, or cardboard box ain't illegal. It's TOTALLY LEGAL. But The Man makes vanlife a hassle at times. Here's how and why.

Why Van Life Is Legal

No U.S. federal, state, or local law absolutely requires American citizens or residents to have a physical address, that is, ta own or rent real estate.

Vandwellers have all the rights and obligations as any other American.

We're required ta pay taxes and obey laws. We have the right ta vote, get federal and state benefits, own personal property, and generally pursue life, liberty, and happiness.

We can live in a van down by the river if we goddamn well please!

Why Do People Think Vandwelling Is Illegal?

For a good reason. Plenty a laws and regulations make being "homeless" – not havin' and sleepin' at a physical address – a boil on our ass. These laws make living in your vehicle illegal in effect. Assholes!

What? Am I contradicting myself?

No. We still have the absolute right ta live in our cars, vans, RVs, tents, whatever. We're just presented with certain problems that curtail our goddamn freedom. Big fuckin' time.

Problem 1 – Bureaucrats Want an Address

Try ta get a driver's license without an address. Try to get government benefits without an address. Try ta register to vote without an address. It's tricky.

Yes, you're entitled to these things without an address. In the case of voting and federal benefits, such as Social Security and SNAP, the government specifically requires the states to find ways to accommodate those without addresses, i.e., the destitute homeless. Usually states do so by lettin' the homeless use the address of a relative, shelter, or social services office.

Nomads with more means – vandwellers, OTR truckers, retired RV lifestylers, traveling salespeople – usually fudge by using the address of a friend or relative. Or we use the address of a private mailbox service, like a UPS store or a mail forwarder, e.g., Traveling Mailbox.

But of course, using a fudge address is technically illegal. There's always the risk some fuckin' bureaucrat will put your balls inta a vice over it. Not likely, they usually don't check, but it's enough to make ya nervous.

Problem 2 – Cities Don't Let You Park Overnight

OK, most of us fuckin' get that we can't park on private land without permission. But shouldn't we be able to park on public land, "the commons"? After all, we're co-owners.

That's where we get fucked over again. Plenty a cities got laws forbidding you to park overnight on particular bits a public land:

• Can't overnight in parks
• Can't overnight on busy streets and highways
• Can't overnight in front of businesses
• Can't overnight in neighborhoods
• Can't overnight in government parking lots
• Can't overnight by rivers and under bridges

So where the fuck are the public lands where you can park overnight? And with this fucked-up patchwork of laws, varying from town to town, how are ya supposed to know when and where you can park? You also got to worry about other laws, like no loitering.

Even when you're parked legally, the cops sometimes fuck with you anyway because ... because they can.

Yes, most national forests and many state forests permit dispersed camping, but that don't do you no goddamn good if you're in town or an urban vandweller. Not a lot of jobs in the forest!

Problem 3 – Parking Lots Are Usually Private

Most big parking lots are owned by stores or landlords. Huge mall and strip mall parking lots might feel like public space, but they're not. End a story.

Some, like Walmart and Cabela's, have vanlifer friendly policies, but that's rare. You can stealth, but you're always chancing getting chased out or worse by security or cops.

What About Our FREEDOM to Live in a Van?

Dictionary definition: "Freedom: the power or right to act, speak, or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint."

So while we have the right to pursue van life, we too often are legally hindered and restrained from doing so. A freedom is no goddamn use if ya can't exercise it!

From a practical, everyday perspective, while vandwelling is legal and our right, we have to break a lot of petty laws and regulations to do so. Exercising our freedom is being criminalized. And that's total goddamn bullshit!

Federal, state, and local governments are unreasonably tramping on our legal right to live in a van down by the river. But the governments' unreasonable constraints on van life won't change without a lot of lobbying and court battles. ... Who's got the time for that!? Who's got the money!?

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Gettin' mail on the road? Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• What LA Federal Case Means for Vandwellers
• Are You Homeless if You Live in a Van?
• Appeals Court Panel Ends L.A. Ban on Homeless Living in Vehicles (LA Times)
• The Legal Issues Of Living In Your Car (AvvoStories)

Read More »

Starting Vanlife for About $100

Vanholio's rig is in the body shop. Meantime, he's livin' outta a rental Dodge Grand Caravan. Thought I'd show you how I took up and how easy it is.

Wait! What Happened to Your Van!?

Got stuck in gravel in New Year's Eve. When the tow boys winched me out sideways, they bent a frame reinforcer called a "torque box." Good news is it's covered by insurance. I'll get her back in about two weeks. Meantime, insurance is coverin' a rental vehicle.

Outfittin' the Dodge Grand Caravan Rental

Yeah, so I got two weeks or so ta kill in this thing. All I needed to do was throw up some curtains and put a mattress in. Pulled all my blankets, pillows, clothes, basic eatin' shit, and groomin' gear outta my own van before I dropped her off.

So what did I spend cashola on? A mattress (~$45), curtains (~$35), and 200W inverter (~$28). Coulda done it cheaper by scroungin' the thrift stores, too!

Makin' Curtains

Peekers can't see much through the back window

I went for curtains instead a Reflectix or whatever 'cause it's fuckin' cold at night. Like down into the high teens. Cost me about $35 ta get 8 yards (8 m) a polyfleece at Walmart, plus clothespins, binder clips, and cheap scissors ta cut it. (Already had some cordage on hand.)

You can see in the picture at top that I got a double line a cordage wrapped through hanger hooks, handles, and seat belt mounts. Since the roof is curved in, the lower line a cord pulls the curtains back in toward the sidewall.

Gettin' the Mattress Warm

The mattress is an inflatable twin mattress Walmart sells for $20. It ain't too bad, but it's kinda cold on the back in these winter nights. So I spent another $25 gettin' a quilt cover, an extra fleece blanket ta put under the quilt, and a fitted sheet to hold it all down. Sleeps warm now.

The mattress and that huge pile a blankets (plus Ms. Barkley) keeps me toasty down inta the teens. Foam mattress'd be better, though.

Keepin' Devices Charged

Got me a 200W Bestek inverter. It's the kind that fits in a cup holder and plugs inta a 12V plug. Has two USB ports, a 12V port, and two AC plugs.

Truth be told, I already had the inverter. But it were about $28 when I got her off Amazon months ago. Without my solar, I needed somethin' ta charge up the laptop, smartphone, and MiFi. This does the trick.

What I'd Add for Long-Term Vanlife

If this were a long-term gig, might get fold-out solar panels to charge up the gadgets at camp. Might also get a little cookstove and a pot or two. Definitely a memory foam mattress, too. That's about it. Those'd add about $200-300 to the bill, max.

Yeah, But What About the Cost of a Van?

Ya know what? Ya don't really *need* a van ta do vanlife. Any vehicle that you can stretch out in will work. I seen folks mod tiny hatchbacks and compact sedans to do that. So, yeah, if ya ain't gotta vehicle, you'll have to come up with some cash. Otherwise, I say start with what ya got. Then it'll only costa ya $100 or so ta get started.

But Your Setup Don't Look Like Instagram ...

Yeah, no shit. If ya wanna get a retro VW bus and line it with recovered barn wood and install a gourmet kitchen, it's gonna cost ya a shitload more ta get started. That's the price of kool. But if your goal is to hit the road, see the world, and live simple, ya don't need all that shit. You're basically just campin' long term in a Rolling Steel Tent. K.I.S.S.

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Vanlife Basics
• 6 Questions to Ask When Choosing Your Van Life Rig
• How to Live in Your Car (wikiHow)
• Stop Packing So Much: the Minimalist Packing List (Medium)

Read More »

What LA Federal Case Means for Vandwellers

No, it sure as hell didn't guarantee your rights to live in a van unmolested. Desertrain vs. City of Los Angeles only made the city rewrite their anti-vanlife ordinance. Now they fuck with LA vandwellers in new ways.

What Was Desertrain vs. City of Los Angeles About?

Los Angeles had an ordinance on the books since 1983 worded that it was illegal to live in your vehicle on LA city streets or city-owned parking lots.

In 2010, the city started getting a lot of complaints about folks living in their vehicles in residential and business districts who were making a mess. So the city started enforcing the ordinance.

A few cops went too far and fined folks who weren't doin' shit. Some were legally sleeping in their vans in private parking lots with permission. Some just looked homeless because they had lotsa personal belongings in the vehicle.

Homeless advocates helped a bunch a these cases come together and make a federal suit that ended up in the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals. (Read a lawyer's breakdown here.)

What Did the Ninth Circuit Court Decide?

It found the LA ordinance unconstitutionally vague. Basically, they thought the wording was too flimsy. No way cops or vandwellers could figure out what was and wasn't allowed.

Plus, the court found the LA cops were using the law as an excuse to harass anyone who looked like they lived in a van. And I'll add, looked like they was poor.

What Does the Court's Decision Mean for Vandwellers?

So we're cool now, right? No. The decision hardly meant shit for vanlife.

Cities can still make ordinances that you can't sleep in your vehicle or park too long wherever. Just like they can make you have plumping on a land and house you own outright.

That's what LA did. In 2016, they passed a new ordinance making it illegal to "live" overnight between 9 pm and 6 am in residential neighborhoods. They also made illegal to vandwell at any time "within one block, or 500 feet, of schools, pre-schools, daycare facilities, and parks." Think they got some rules about parkin' in fronta businesses, too.

Two other points:

1. The Ninth Circuit Court's decision only applies in its district, which is basically West Coast.
2. Redneck towns and asshole cops will still fuck with you. Might be illegal of 'em, but you got money and time to sue?

So … Is Living in Your Van Legal or Illegal?

As I wrote about in another post, living in your van is legal in principle. No law says ya gotta live in sticks'n'bricks. You're "free," so they say.

Federal land boondocking is still cool and easy. But cities? All kindsa petty ordinances and laws make everyday vanlife practices illegal in cities. It's fucked up and confusing if ya don't know the local laws. Just try dancin' around all them rules! Or if you're dealin' with asshole cops.

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Is Living in Your Van Illegal?
• Are You Homeless if You Live in a Van?
• Appeals Court Panel Ends L.A. Ban on Homeless Living in Vehicles (LA Times)
• The Legal Issues Of Living In Your Car (AvvoStories)

Read More »

What If You Only Had Six Months to Live?

Vanholio ain't got much wisdom. But he's learned to ask hisself this question: If I only had six months to live, what would I do? Then I plan accordingly.

The power of that question come to me some years ago. I was going through a rough patch, a breakup with my ex. I'd always seen us together, growin' old. I didn't know what the fuck to do. Was totally fuckin' lost.

Then somehow, that question – What would I do if I only had six months to live? – came to me. The answer? Told myself I'd sell everything up, buy an RV, go sit my ass in Big Bend National Park, and write a novel. That was my guiding star.

After I moved out, I did something close. I stayed in my friend's country deer-hunting trailer for the summer. I wrote a crappy first draft of a novel. (It'll never see press. Trust me.) I was miserable after the breakup, but I was thrilled with how I was living.

That was a decade ago. And I went down some wrong paths since then. But that guiding star was always in my vision.

Today, the answer is almost the same: I'd travel and write. So I'm an OTR vandweller doing just that. It's a miracle life, this "living in a van down by the river."

What's *your* vision? What would *you* do if you only had six months to live?

Want to spend more time with family? Find a way to work less or maybe have longer vacations together, like going into teaching to have summers off.

Walk the Appalachian trail? Start backpacking on vacations and set aside money to take on the AP eventually.

Want to make sure your kids and SO have a house owned free and clear? Prioritize your spending to pay that sucker off.

Want to work in your garden? Maybe look at going into market farming or community garden organizing.

In the real world, you might not bullseye your perfect vision. There's a whole lot of fuckin' considerations. But you can get damn close if you're honest about what you want.

What I found about getting into vandwelling and writing is that it wasn't that hard. Yes, I had to plan and make sacrifices. It took time to pull everything together. But the logistics flowed easier than expected once I set myself to reaching that star. It's bein' clear with yourself and makin' the fuckin' decision that's hard.

So I ask you: What would *you* do if you only had six months to live?

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Get mail on the road – Traveling Mailbox! (review)

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Also See ...

• Considering Van Life? Take the Goddamn Plunge Already!
• Planning to Die Soon
• 4 Steps to Letting Go of Expectations (Cheap RV Living)
• 6 Ways to Live as If You Have 6 Months Left to Live (mindbodygreen)

Read More »

3 Ways to Survive a Vanlife Christmas

Well, what the fuck makes Christmas and all those other end-of-year holidays so goddamn merry anyway? Sometimes they ain’t. I know, I been there. For anyone, holidays can be stressful. If you live alone in a van down by the river? Can be that much worse.

But here’s Vanholio’s constructive ideas to get your head outta your ass. Try happy out. You’ll like it!

?? #Vanlife question? Contact Vanholio! direct !!

1. Do Something Fun by Yourself, for Yourself

No point sitting around like the Grinch, stewin’ in your own juices. Make merry on your lonesome.

Some years back, Vanholio got divorced. It was rough. Naturally.

First Father’s Day alone, away from the kids, the blackness was overtakin’ me. The swamp looked deep and cool, easy to just sink on into.

So I got off my ass and went for a loooong hike up a mountain ridge. Natural beauty, tons of exercise, the knowledge that I was a free man in nature. Did me good. Picked me right the hell up. Got me through the day. I even had some fun.

What would you like to do? Something you don’t normally get to. Go to a favorite place? Stay in a fancy hotel? Play a shit ton of video games? Give yourself that special present.

2. Elbow Your Way to the Table

Now, Vanholio’s normally a bit shy. He don’t just make friends everywhere. That’s by choice

But couple Thanksgivings ago, he was in Florida. I’ve got some friends in Florida, but they already had plans to be guests elsewhere.

It was forward of me, but I asked my friends if they could wangle an invitation to Thanksgiving where they was going. They agreed. They got it. I went.

Turns out the hostess had been a career Army nurse and totally got the need to find “family” wherever you can on the road. Never felt more welcome. Lovely people. One of my best Thanksgivings ever.

If you’re not near people to ask, go near people. Stay at an RV park. Bet most of them got something going on. Hell, I bet Slab City’s got a heck of a party planned!

3. Gather Your Own Posse

Don’t you think other vandwellers might be in the same spot? That they don’t got people nearby (or at all)?

Start a gathering! Don’t need anything fancy. A location and a potluck will do. Cheap RV Living folks are gatherin' early in and around Quartzite, AZ for the Rubber Tramp Rendezvous. Get into the Cheap RV Living Forum to see what's up. If you can’t hook up with them, do what they’re doing where you are! Ain’t hard.

Talk to folks on the other forums, too: /r/vandwellers, Squat the Planet, and Vandog Traveller. Plenty of van folk in the same position you are.

Also See …

• Considering Van Life? Take the Goddamn Plunge …
  
• 10 Things to Do if You’re Alone for the Holidays (PsychCentral)
  
• 30 Alternatives to a Dysfunctional Family Christmas (Jodie Gale)
  
• 35 Solo Travel Destinations for Christmas (Solo Traveler)

Read More »

Van Life Travel Safety 101

“Ain’t many guys travel around together,” he mused. “I don’t know why. Maybe ever’body in the whole damn world is scared of each other.” – John Steinbeck, Of Mice And Men

I assume that if you’re reading this article, you’re not a big scary MMA fighter driving a military fort on wheels with an arsenal under your bed. Then again, even if you meet that description, you might find a valuable point or two for van life here (and at my blog, Vansage.com).

First and foremost, I want you to know this is not a fear-mongering article. The official van life travel plan is to enjoy your journey, be social, meet cool people and have adventures.

You never want to let fear rule your life. However, I am a firm believer in the Vietnam war era slogan, “stay alert, stay alive.” I have learned that an ounce of prevention is worth…possibly my life.

7 Tips for Van Life Travel Safety – for Women and Men

#1 – On the Road

Of course crime can happen anywhere, but some locations are worse than others.

For example, I’ve seen some sketchy things at rest stops, and this prompted me to execute a Google search, something like “Rest stop crime, US”.  The results left me a bit stunned. So many crimes, so much violence.

The same goes for convenience stores, which turn out to be among the most likely places to get shot, robbed or mugged in the US.

Of course, stopping for gas, groceries, bathroom breaks, and sleep are realities of van life. However, there are some general rules to follow when it comes to executing these activities safely.

Instead of stopping last minute, plan ahead. Do some research and find the best places to rest, sleep and shop.

Here are some of the safer options:

• Along main streets
• Grocery stores
• Libraries
• Hospitals
• Municipal lots and buildings
• Restaurants

I know what you’re thinking: “Nearly every gas station is also a convenience store”. True that, but it doesn’t mean you have to go in. Plan to use your card at the pump (vs walking in with a handful of cash), and remember to “Stay alert...”. Also, grocery store gas stations tend to be safer options.

#2 – At the Campsite

This is one place I have run into trouble more than a couple of times.

It’s important to be aware of your neighbors. Sometimes they’re just annoying. However, there are times when you’ll find yourself next to a neighbor who’s sketchy, lewd, intoxicated...

Know where your campground ranger or host is located and consider camping near them if you’re alone. Also, pay attention to their behavior. Not everyone in a uniform is safe and sane.

Most people I have encountered at campgrounds are harmless, but it pays to be conscious of your neighbors and take action early if you see something that looks off.

In fact, if your gut is telling you to move to a new site, or leave all together, listen!

#3 - Stealth Camping

Not every neighborhood allows van camping. In fact, some places such as Flagstaff, Arizona actually have laws against it. While I don’t recommend it as a nightly habit, it can be useful to learn to stealth camp.

Avoid remote areas with no people. It’s tempting to find a warehouse district or wooded area on the edge of town, but guess who else hides out there (I’ll let your imagination run with that one)? A nice clean housing area with a few cars parked on the streets is a better bet.

If you’ll be doing any stealth camping, keep the van clean inside and out and keep your behavior low key. No loud music, kill the lights for an early bedtime and get up early to move on.

Finally, never stay twice in the same location. That’s called overstaying your welcome, not stealth camping.

I’ve heard it said by some veteran vanners that no matter how stealthy you are, the cops always know when you’re sleeping in your van. Most of them don’t care as long as you’re clean and respectful.

All this relates to safety because homeowners can get testy when a garbage scow rolls up spewing death metal and dumping bottles of urine. I’ve heard more than one story of 3 am pounding on the side of the van, not by cops, but local permanent residents.

Don’t be that vanner. The best way to be treated with respect and decency is to be the first to offer it.

Tip #4 – Weapons

If you choose to arm yourself, please keep the following in mind: Every weapon requires some level of training and practice. No matter how simple or powerful, there will be a learning curve and a physical element. Take some time to learn how to not shoot (stab, spray, bludgeon, poison, electrocute, inflame…) yourself or your loved ones.

The most minimal and potentially valuable weapon is your own body. If you’re able bodied and want to feel a higher level of safety at all times, take some self-defense classes or at least read up on the subject. A good self defense instructor will have tips and tricks for staying safe that most people never think of.

I carry a personal pepper spray in my bag. It goes with me on walks to the bathroom at the campground, and pretty much everywhere else. I keep wasp or bear spray inside the van because they are both more powerful than regular pepper spray and travel further.

A fellow van traveler, and our gracious host for this article, Vanholio, won’t even keep a gun in his van. I tend to agree with pretty much every point he makes in that article.

If you feel the same way but want a bit more protection, you can carry a pellet gun for a last resort situation.

Tip #5 – Alarms

The cheapest alarm is a whistle. You can carry this on your keychain at all times. Additionally, you should arm your vehicle with a car alarm and make sure it’s set while you sleep. Any breach of your home will be met with a loud awakening! Get a lock fob with a panic button.

Tip #6 – Locks

Before you go to bed, check and double check the locks. You should also try to sleep with the windows mostly closed. If you have a roof fan, go ahead and close the windows. This also applies if you are rolling through a sketchy area. But again with the ounce of prevention; plan to avoid sketchy areas altogether.

Keep your valuables locked up in your van, cartop carrier, bike rack… I look at it like this: Valuable objects represent money to people in need. So by not flaunting my cool bike, camping gear or other valuables, I won’t have to defend it against someone with less to lose than I.

Tip #7 – Cell Service

Make sure you have enough service to make 911 calls. Although most cell phones will dial out in an emergency, it is another ounce of prevention.

Again, preparation is king: In planning ahead for where you want to sleep, look for areas with good cell coverage.

Of course you can go much deeper than these tips for safety and security. For example, I’m designing a small, fireproof safe to be installed in my van for storing cameras, laptop, passport… More on this topic coming soon at Vansage.com: ‘How to leave your van unattended without worry’.

Enjoy your journey. Take the fork in the road that leads to possible adventure. Relax and breathe easy and take in the sights. Just don’t be naive. Do it with at least a modicum of preparation for the worst.

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When she's not writing guest posts about van life, Veronica Cavanaugh is camping, backpacking, or planning her next outdoor adventure. She also enjoys watching old movies and writing poetry. See more of her work and a whole world of valuable van travel goodness at VanSage.com.

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Also See ...

• Why I Don't Keep a Gun in the Van
  
• Yoogo – Secret Vandweller-Style 'Dim Mak' Weapon Revealed
  
• No Nonsense Self-Defense (Website)
  
• Rate Your Risk (Website)

Read More »

Dispersed Camping Shut Down in Hunting Season

Vanholio's made a discovery this last fall months. In some – not all – national forests, the U.S. Forest Service don't allow dispersed camping durin' general hunting season. You must use a campground or hunt camp.

Sames true of some state forests and wildlife management areas (WMA).

?? #Vanlife question? Contact Vanholio! direct !!

What Kinda Campin' Is Allowed, What Ain't?

Now, campin' as a whole ain't cut off. Them forests as cut dispersed campin' keep open campgrounds. And most have designated "hunt camps," which range from seasonal campgrounds with all the amenities to small areas of cleared brush.

By "general hunting season," I mean any a them times hunters is out for big game with guns. Different states call it different things. But I ain't had the kibosh put on my dispersed campin' during bow and blackpowder seasons.

Which National Forests Restrict Dispersed Camping?

Don't know yet which all U.S. National Forests, but there's a few I can speak to from my recent travels in the South along US-84 (little 84, not the interstate).

• Texas
• Sam Houston National Forest – approved campsites only
• Davy Crockett National Forest – approved campsites only
• Angelina National Forest – approved campsites only
• Sabine National Forest – approved campsites only
• Louisiana
• Kisatchie National Forest – no restrictions
• Mississippi
• Homochitto National Forest – no restrictions
• Desoto National Forest – no restrictions, except state WMAs use approved campsites only
• Alabama
• Conecuh National Forest – approved campsites only
• Florida
• Apalachicola National Forest – approved campsites only

Call any forest ya wanna know more about on dispersed campin' limitations. Don't rely on their Forest Service websites. These ain't kept up good.

If ya know more, let me know in the comments. Think I'll try to put together a bigass post with a master list for future.

Also See ...

• Free 'Dispersed' Camping – Key to Cheap Vanlife
  
• Wear Your Blaze Orange Safety Vest – Hunter's Aprowlin'!
  
• List of U.S. National Forests (Wikipedia)
  
• Keeping Your Dog Safe During Hunting Season (Dogtipper)

Read More »